Strange how quickly time passes and there is so much craziness as it passes that its easy to forget how much you've experienced in your life. As I fed my sweet baby his bottle the other morning I was amazed at his gorgeous blue eyes, just like his daddy's. I was suddenly reminded of the first time I saw Kyles blue eyes and was thrown into the biggest crush ever...
He was one of Tony's closest friends.. I met him for the first time on Tony's birthday dinner at the house.. I remember Tony and his friends watched a movie after dinner and I joined them.. It was Tony, Rob Hampton, Aaron Seminoff and Kyle.. I hardly even noticed Kyle since I was so into Tony's other friend haha I thought he was super cute.. then again, at 15 what tall blonde isn't cute? Not long after that Tony played a show with his old band and Kyle was there again but I was still crushin on the other one.. I got ditched by Tony and my crush and not knowing anybody there and the venue being closed I ended up in Kyles car with him and my now brother and sister in law. I clearly remember thinking "these people are crazy!!" Kayla and Michael just fought over stupid stuff the whole time while kyle yelled at them to shut up.. Nothing has changed 7 years later. A few months later it happened. I saw him in a whole new way and I don't know what it was that changed. I was sitting inside a gym with Tony waiting for a class to start and Tony said, "sweet Kyles here." I looked over and there he was, walking up to the door in a gray hat with his long curly hair resting on his shoulders.. He had a band shirt on and blue dickie shorts with skate shoes and ugly white ankle socks. He had a funny walk but You would have thought there was a bright light shining behind him. He walked in the door and started talking to Tony. I couldn't stop looking at his bright blue eyes and his rosie cheeks as he smiled.. I had such a crush and didn't know why! He was nothing like anyone I had ever liked.. I was way into the clean cut american eagle boys with nice hair and tan skin.. this guy was so grunge!!! It wasn't long before Tony found out I loved his friends smile so he'd take me to Baskin Robbins to visit him at work and Tony would say, "wanna see his smile?" in a teasing way to embarrass me and he'd crack a joke to make Kyle laugh.. I remember thinking, this guy has no style but man! I can't stop starring at him!! Pretty soon Tonys ex hired me on at Baskin Robbins.. Kyle trained me on my first day and soon I became his boss. He had a girlfriend and I completely respected her as that.. even if she was half man and a total meanie head. I think everyone at the store knew how much I was into him except for him.. We got along so well though. We worked great as a team and always had a blast.. Then it happened.. the day I waited for for a year and a half.. she dumped him!! And boy was I there to run in a grab what was mine.. We had our first date on Valentines day of 2005. Most awkward date ever.. He was late to pick me up, then had to come inside to meet my dad since my dad couldn't remember which friend of Tony's it was that was picking me up. He brought me a red rose.. I'm shocked that the fumes of all his cologne didn't kill it on the way over.. He was wearing a black beanie with his long curly hair still resting on his shoulders.. he had earings and chuck taylors on. My dad was pretty surprised that I was so excited to go on a date with a grungebutt. He sat nervously on the couch while Kerri and Amy glared at him. Finally we were off to dinner.. Fresh Choice with Tony and his ex. We sat and ate while we watched them fight.. after that entertainment we were off to a nursing home to visit Nonnie. Awkward. Then I gave him his valentine and some chocolate in the car and he tried to kiss me.. REJECTED! So we went and got some ice cream at work.. We ran into tony and his ex there and they were still fighting.. Then it was back home by 10 and I was nice enough to hug him. I remember getting on AIM as soon as we got home and him telling me he was so glad he at least got a hug from me, he was going crazy! Even after the weirdest first date, we knew within days that we would become girlfriend and boyfriend. We just got along way too well.. it was easy! We were ourselves with each other from the start.
Thinking back it feels like we were on that date yesterday. Strange to think that 4 years and lots of ice cream later we are married with a son. I feel blessed every day when I thank God for my boys. I love that I had such a huge crush on him for so long and now I get to wash his dirty clothes. How crazy is that? Its so true though. I love him and I know we were made for each other.. He is my best friend forever and I am his.. I couldn't imagine my life any other way..
I love you baby!!!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Huuurl!
Craziest Roller Coaster Ride of my life yet. So crazy that I literally had that feeling where youre gonna puke and its stuck in your throat and you fight to keep it there so it doesnt make its way out.. gross, I know, but at least I'm not talking about c-diff.. my newest obtained medical info. Now thats some nasty crap.. literally.
This last week my family came closer than ever before to losing Catie-Nana. You could imagine the relief that was felt as she sat in her cozy green chair last night with her new blanket that she had explained was from her friend Sandy. The best feeling was when she asked for pizza for dinner.. like nothing had ever happened.
At one point in the hospital my dad put his arm around me and asked if I was ready for this..anybody that knows me could answer that one.. he went on to explain that he could be ready in two years..knowing that he will never be ready I realized how desperate we all were for more time. Someone had made the comment that we should be ready since we have known this was coming for years... how ignorant. Thats one thing that is always brought to my attention in these situations.. sucky people. I'm not even going to sugar coat it cause I dont sugar coat anything but cookies and cupcakes. To be honest though, I have never been more disapointed and more encouraged at the same time in my life by people. We all know how I always see the negative first and then have to make myself chill out and look for all the positive... thats why at the end of day one in the hospital I had even thought to make a visitor tally.Thats also why in all my blogs I start off in biotch mode and end with happy thankful mode. So here we go..
Can I just ask a question?
Where the hell was our family through all of this? At the closest possible time of Caties death where were her cousins, aunts and uncles? She had 3 family members visit her and that number would have been 8 had it not been for a surgery, a temp of 103 and possible pneumonia. But why wasnt the number of family members coming to give Catie their love and my parents some support over 30+? If I could just be given a reason maybe I wouldnt be so frustrated.. is our family tired of hearing about it? is she old news? I dont get it.. if she hadn't come home what would they have told me at her service that I could believe to be genuine? I can't believe that no one knew how serious it was since all of our friends new without even being given details..
now for the happy stuff..
All of the lack of interest/concern from family toward the situation was a good thing because it showed me who our real family is. Our friends. Not my friends that I've grown up with over the years.. graduated kindergarten, junior high and highschool with (and please don't tell me you didn't know about it cause we all live our lives on fb) I'm talking about everyone else.. The 50+ people that came to visit Catie and bring food and cards to my parents.. the friends that just came and sat next to Catie.. the friends that brought dinners to my siblings and made themselves available for worst case scenarios.. the friends that came and prayed over my parents and Catie multiple times. The friends that blew my phone up with text messages even when they themselves were sick and in and out of the doctors..
I know it shouldn't matter because I know everyone cares about Catie, our family included and the love, encouragement and support from so many friends should be enough. I really don't think some people realize how much support helps get through a situation like this. How much it means when people take the time out of their life to stop and pay a visit. Stop and make a phone call. I mean, if you can call when you're half way across the U.S. in a blizzard and a freezing cold mini van, I'd like to think you sure as hell could call from solano county, the bay area or sacramento.
I always read my moms emails that she sends out.. (yeah, the whole thing tony haha) and I'm amazed. I don't know how my parents stay so positive. Just another reason I look up to them so much. But just because 99.9% of the time they are positive doesn't mean that they aren't hurt for the same reasons I am. Its just life I guess... Its just me throwing myself a pity party like usual and not knowing how to grieve without getting mad at everyone thats not there for me or my family instead of getting mad at batten disease. I'm the only one that can get rid of the bitter half of my blogs and the bitter half of my thoughts and feelings..
I love how I have to type a novel to realize this stuff.
Anyway.. these things really do make me feel like I'll puke everywhere.. but then things calm down and I find myself sitting in the same room as Catie at home and I'm fine again.. I have more time to spend with her and try and figure out how to handle everything the next time around... oi.. Lets hope its not for a long time...
Now that all that steam has been let off..
This last week my family came closer than ever before to losing Catie-Nana. You could imagine the relief that was felt as she sat in her cozy green chair last night with her new blanket that she had explained was from her friend Sandy. The best feeling was when she asked for pizza for dinner.. like nothing had ever happened.
At one point in the hospital my dad put his arm around me and asked if I was ready for this..anybody that knows me could answer that one.. he went on to explain that he could be ready in two years..knowing that he will never be ready I realized how desperate we all were for more time. Someone had made the comment that we should be ready since we have known this was coming for years... how ignorant. Thats one thing that is always brought to my attention in these situations.. sucky people. I'm not even going to sugar coat it cause I dont sugar coat anything but cookies and cupcakes. To be honest though, I have never been more disapointed and more encouraged at the same time in my life by people. We all know how I always see the negative first and then have to make myself chill out and look for all the positive... thats why at the end of day one in the hospital I had even thought to make a visitor tally.Thats also why in all my blogs I start off in biotch mode and end with happy thankful mode. So here we go..
Can I just ask a question?
Where the hell was our family through all of this? At the closest possible time of Caties death where were her cousins, aunts and uncles? She had 3 family members visit her and that number would have been 8 had it not been for a surgery, a temp of 103 and possible pneumonia. But why wasnt the number of family members coming to give Catie their love and my parents some support over 30+? If I could just be given a reason maybe I wouldnt be so frustrated.. is our family tired of hearing about it? is she old news? I dont get it.. if she hadn't come home what would they have told me at her service that I could believe to be genuine? I can't believe that no one knew how serious it was since all of our friends new without even being given details..
now for the happy stuff..
All of the lack of interest/concern from family toward the situation was a good thing because it showed me who our real family is. Our friends. Not my friends that I've grown up with over the years.. graduated kindergarten, junior high and highschool with (and please don't tell me you didn't know about it cause we all live our lives on fb) I'm talking about everyone else.. The 50+ people that came to visit Catie and bring food and cards to my parents.. the friends that just came and sat next to Catie.. the friends that brought dinners to my siblings and made themselves available for worst case scenarios.. the friends that came and prayed over my parents and Catie multiple times. The friends that blew my phone up with text messages even when they themselves were sick and in and out of the doctors..
I know it shouldn't matter because I know everyone cares about Catie, our family included and the love, encouragement and support from so many friends should be enough. I really don't think some people realize how much support helps get through a situation like this. How much it means when people take the time out of their life to stop and pay a visit. Stop and make a phone call. I mean, if you can call when you're half way across the U.S. in a blizzard and a freezing cold mini van, I'd like to think you sure as hell could call from solano county, the bay area or sacramento.
I always read my moms emails that she sends out.. (yeah, the whole thing tony haha) and I'm amazed. I don't know how my parents stay so positive. Just another reason I look up to them so much. But just because 99.9% of the time they are positive doesn't mean that they aren't hurt for the same reasons I am. Its just life I guess... Its just me throwing myself a pity party like usual and not knowing how to grieve without getting mad at everyone thats not there for me or my family instead of getting mad at batten disease. I'm the only one that can get rid of the bitter half of my blogs and the bitter half of my thoughts and feelings..
I love how I have to type a novel to realize this stuff.
Anyway.. these things really do make me feel like I'll puke everywhere.. but then things calm down and I find myself sitting in the same room as Catie at home and I'm fine again.. I have more time to spend with her and try and figure out how to handle everything the next time around... oi.. Lets hope its not for a long time...
Now that all that steam has been let off..
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
Ciao 2009
A list of some of my favorite memories made in 2009
January
Tony, Kyle and I celebrated the life of Frank J Pompi one night after he passed away. It was a sad night but one I'll always remember and love.
February
I celebrated New Years Eve with Catie and Annie. They had no idea they were listening to a youtube replay at 630 in the evening.
I also wrote 3 songs that I recorded with my husband in the studio. I felt so tight for writing songs, singing and playing them.
I made a baby and didn't even know it. :D
March
I was reminded of the importance of my dads career and the danger he puts himself in every day. I started loving my dad even more than I ever had or even thought possible. He's always been my hero, that month just gave me an even stronger respect. RIP Oakland officers.
April
I found out I was PREGNANT!!!
My husband and I celebrated our One Year Anniversary. Love you baby!
I saw Lily Allen ( my cruuuush!! ) in concert
May
I saw my baby in an ultrasound for the first time in my life.
July
I found out I was having a boy!
My husband graduated from college with a BAS in Audio Engineering
August
8th Annual Tahoe vacation with the fam
I made home made pasta sauce for the first time
September
I had a 3D ultrasound and saw my sons face for the first time
I started volunteering at the AWANAs program at my dads church
I had a photo shoot with Joey in my belly
I got a new car!
October
I was given a baby shower
I saw TTNY in SF
I celebrated Catie's 20th birthday with her
I purchased my brothers record, Road Maps and Heart Attacks
I went to DisneyLand with my family for a day <3
November
I was given another baby shower
I gave birth to my baby boy, Joseph Alan!!
December
I woke up on Christmas morning with my Husband on the right of me and my son on the left. xoxo
Talk about a good year!
Peace out 2009!
January
Tony, Kyle and I celebrated the life of Frank J Pompi one night after he passed away. It was a sad night but one I'll always remember and love.
February
I celebrated New Years Eve with Catie and Annie. They had no idea they were listening to a youtube replay at 630 in the evening.
I also wrote 3 songs that I recorded with my husband in the studio. I felt so tight for writing songs, singing and playing them.
I made a baby and didn't even know it. :D
March
I was reminded of the importance of my dads career and the danger he puts himself in every day. I started loving my dad even more than I ever had or even thought possible. He's always been my hero, that month just gave me an even stronger respect. RIP Oakland officers.
April
I found out I was PREGNANT!!!
My husband and I celebrated our One Year Anniversary. Love you baby!
I saw Lily Allen ( my cruuuush!! ) in concert
May
I saw my baby in an ultrasound for the first time in my life.
July
I found out I was having a boy!
My husband graduated from college with a BAS in Audio Engineering
August
8th Annual Tahoe vacation with the fam
I made home made pasta sauce for the first time
September
I had a 3D ultrasound and saw my sons face for the first time
I started volunteering at the AWANAs program at my dads church
I had a photo shoot with Joey in my belly
I got a new car!
October
I was given a baby shower
I saw TTNY in SF
I celebrated Catie's 20th birthday with her
I purchased my brothers record, Road Maps and Heart Attacks
I went to DisneyLand with my family for a day <3
November
I was given another baby shower
I gave birth to my baby boy, Joseph Alan!!
December
I woke up on Christmas morning with my Husband on the right of me and my son on the left. xoxo
Talk about a good year!
Peace out 2009!
Friday, December 25, 2009
Pinch Me
Ya know those moments that feel so unreal? Like you need to pinch yourself to make sure you're not asleep? This is one of them.
I'm sitting by our Christmas tree feeding Joey and Im amazed that I have a son this Christmas morning. Last Christmas morning I saw my uncle for the last time as I stood next to his hospital bed and held his hand.
This year my family not only has a new little life to celebrate but hes mine! This year Im a mom, a Santa Claus and the happiest Ive ever been in my life because of it.
Today I can't see my parents and siblings because some of them are sick and we cant risk Joey catching it. I had a good cry with a smashin pity part when reality set in about this but since have been able to find some sweet things in this holiday to be thankful for like the fact that I cant spend another Christmas with Catie but not because shes with us anymore. Shes here celebrating another visit from santa and I'll see her in a week or so.. heck theres alot, I'll make a list of the best things like...
my 3 hugs from my Aunt Cathy yesterday that she obviously knew I needed more than I did.
my aunt marianne hosting xmas eve last minute so we could all be together.
watching my 3 little cousins from China, little Jake and my Joey all be together on Christmas for the first time.
Spending Christmas eve with my Nana and Poppie. My favorite couple of all time.
Seeing my dad and Amy out for a walk right by our apartment right as we were pulling up at home and flipping the fastest bitch of all time to go drive by and say hi.
Getting a call from the next generation of Poppie Santas. A lifelong tradish for us kids to get a phone call from our poppie disguised as Santa every year has now become a tradish for my dad to do since he is a Poppie this year. Joey wasn't in the mood to talk to Santa but it made my day.
Just some of my top fave things so far and its only Christmas morning! so far so good.
Merry Christmas!
xoxo
I'm sitting by our Christmas tree feeding Joey and Im amazed that I have a son this Christmas morning. Last Christmas morning I saw my uncle for the last time as I stood next to his hospital bed and held his hand.
This year my family not only has a new little life to celebrate but hes mine! This year Im a mom, a Santa Claus and the happiest Ive ever been in my life because of it.
Today I can't see my parents and siblings because some of them are sick and we cant risk Joey catching it. I had a good cry with a smashin pity part when reality set in about this but since have been able to find some sweet things in this holiday to be thankful for like the fact that I cant spend another Christmas with Catie but not because shes with us anymore. Shes here celebrating another visit from santa and I'll see her in a week or so.. heck theres alot, I'll make a list of the best things like...
my 3 hugs from my Aunt Cathy yesterday that she obviously knew I needed more than I did.
my aunt marianne hosting xmas eve last minute so we could all be together.
watching my 3 little cousins from China, little Jake and my Joey all be together on Christmas for the first time.
Spending Christmas eve with my Nana and Poppie. My favorite couple of all time.
Seeing my dad and Amy out for a walk right by our apartment right as we were pulling up at home and flipping the fastest bitch of all time to go drive by and say hi.
Getting a call from the next generation of Poppie Santas. A lifelong tradish for us kids to get a phone call from our poppie disguised as Santa every year has now become a tradish for my dad to do since he is a Poppie this year. Joey wasn't in the mood to talk to Santa but it made my day.
Just some of my top fave things so far and its only Christmas morning! so far so good.
Merry Christmas!
xoxo
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Change Can Be Good
Relief is one thing I didnt imagine feeling after my son was born. I mean sure, relief for my knees and heels and back but Im talking more emotional relief. I was almost positive Id have more stress because Id be trying to take care of my son and feel guilty for not taking care of Catie and Annie as much as I was. I thought this because a while back when one of the Batten kids became an angel I had a panic attack and I remember saying "my life will end with Caties life" over and over. My husband calmed me down and reminded me of the baby growing in my belly and assured me that he will become my priority and the one I care for most and that I will continue to care for him when Caties gone. I didnt believe him but now I know I should have. This little guy has become my life. I even feel like hes giving me a new life or at least helping me live the one Ive already been given. I dont dwell on losing Catie anymore.. and its not to say I dont feel bad for not helping with the girls but I dont let it take over me for missing one of their baths or showers.
I guess Im trying to say it feels so amazing to take care of a person that doesnt have an expected departure date.. To know Joeys going to grow with each feeding rather than wonder how much longer Caties mobility will allow her to eat before her tube is in full use. Little things like that. I guess thanks to Joeys life I finally understand my moms obsession with the word HOPE because I finally understand the meaning.
I guess Im trying to say it feels so amazing to take care of a person that doesnt have an expected departure date.. To know Joeys going to grow with each feeding rather than wonder how much longer Caties mobility will allow her to eat before her tube is in full use. Little things like that. I guess thanks to Joeys life I finally understand my moms obsession with the word HOPE because I finally understand the meaning.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
A Labor of Love
I have found a greater respect for my mom. For all moms. For the moms that are never there for their kids and the ones that are over bearing. For the moms that have been mothers for years upon years and moms who's motherhood stopped in the delivery room. For moms that embrace their children and those that embrace safe baby havens. If you've been through labor you have my full respect. It truly is a labor of love to bring someone into this world no matter what follows after that little baby is welcomed into the world.
I'm a mom now and this is my Labor of Love Story.
Sunday Nov. 22 Kyle was off for the day and his alarm failed. We missed church because we overslept but decided to make the best of it. We chilled in bed talking to my belly trying to convince Joey to come out so we could meet him. We told him to come out that night so daddy wouldn't have to work at 4am monday morning. Then we decided we'd do all we could to push him along. After all, people are convinced that certain things will put you in labor, I personally still believe the only thing that puts you in labor is a baby thats ready to come out but still, it was fun trying!
We "got to know each other" since everyone including the labor and delivery nurses said that it would induce labor..
then we went to pietros and got an all meat pizza.. 7 meats.. not my style but they say the meats really get things moving..
after lunch we took a nice long walk around downtown since gravity is said to move things along also..
After our relaxing date we headed over to my family's house and then his and we spent the afternoon catching up with our favorite people.
That evening I started having contractions but they weren't too painful and they were very far apart so I didn't think about it..we went home and went to bed and I was up all night with horrible contractions but for some reason didn't think about it at all.. I just kept sleeping inbetween them.
Monday Nov. 23 Kyle went to work at 4am. While he was there he was offered a job at the local radio station. good thing joey didn't come the night before!
I stayed home all day cleaning up.. My sister in law shook her head at me while I vacuumed and said to chill out since I was about to pop.. little did she know. Later that night I ended up giving Tony and Kyle haircuts and thats when the contractions really kicked in! Then it was off to the mall to get some much needed clothes for my hubby since I knew he'd have to go without for a long time if we didn't go that night.. little did I know.
Thinking back I can't believe myself for doing all that I did that day. I should have been at home relaxing not cleaning, cutting and shopping!
We got back from the mall and went for a walk which made my contractions jump from every 5 min to every 2 minutes.. I went home and took a hot bath to see if that calmed them down and sure enough it didn't.. we were on our way to the hospital and arrived there at exactly 1opm.
They hooked me up to the monitors and checked me but I was only 1 cm dilated.. they won't admit you until you're 3. Thankfully since we had come from vacaville they said we could stay in the hospital and walk for 2 hours and they'd check me again.. desperate to have our baby and not have to go home we walked. For 2 hours straight up and down the empty hospital halls.. SOOO crappy!!! I thought my back was going to snap in half! After 2 hours we went back and got hooked up and checked again.. I was still only 2 cm but my contractions were insane so the doc said he'd let me stay while he did a c section and if I could get to 3 by the time he was done in the OR he'd admit me otherwise we were on our way. In the next hour my contractions took off and I was in full on labor.. I don't know how to explain the pain but man. I still can't believe how bad it hurts.. Finally I was checked again and at 3 cm so I was admitted and thankfully given my DRUGS!!!! then it was chill.. I couldn't feel anything from my belly down and if I could get epidurals in pill form I'd go numb every weekend.. coolest feeling ever.. anyway.. I ended up getting stuck at 3 cm for 5 hours before they finally gave me pitocin to speed things up.. 5 hours later my water broke, 1 hour later I was at 8 cm and 2 1/2 hours later of pushing my son was born! oh and you can still feel the pushing part with an ep so i don't have a clue as to how ppl do it natural.. ya'll are nuts!
Tue Nov 24th Joseph Alan Wieder arrived.
He was 8lbs 10oz and was 20 inches long. He was born at 9:56 pm 4 minutes short of 24 hours from the time we got there the night before. Longest 24 hours of my life! and my poor husband had been up since 4am the day before..
Looking back I can't believe how providential everything was. We were able to have an awesome date on sunday together and catch up with our family's before parenting began. Kyle had to go to work monday and was offered a job. We should have been sent home from the hospital that night but the nurses were awesome so we got to stay long enough to go into active labor. Our dads were off of work. My brother was home from tour and Catie and Annie were chill.
I'll never forget this experience. The way Joseph looked when they held him up and placed him on my chest. Gray and wrinkled. He was calm and quiet as soon as he heard his mommy and daddy talking to him and just lay there with his big blue eyes scanning back and forth listening closely. The look on Kyles face when he saw his son and the kiss he gave me when he told me "good job, i love you." The proud look on my moms face as she took pictures and bawled her eyes out. We had become parents and I have never been happier in my entire life! One of Joeys great uncles recently came over to meet him and made the comment that he was having a spiritual moment while holding him and he couldn't be more right on. Thats exactly how it is. I just stare at him and I'm in awe that this little baby was at one point microscopic and he is now a gorgeous healthy newborn that is half me and half of my best friend. I can't believe that we wanted to wait 5 years for this..
So yeah.. my labor of love in a nutshell.. I could give the details but who likes details.. Joey came out with road rash on the back of his head and a bruise on the front.. I think you could imagine the details now? very unnecessary. besides, the most important part of the story is the fact that I have been blessed with a husband I don't deserve and a beautiful son I can't take credit for creating. Life is good!
I'm a mom now and this is my Labor of Love Story.
Sunday Nov. 22 Kyle was off for the day and his alarm failed. We missed church because we overslept but decided to make the best of it. We chilled in bed talking to my belly trying to convince Joey to come out so we could meet him. We told him to come out that night so daddy wouldn't have to work at 4am monday morning. Then we decided we'd do all we could to push him along. After all, people are convinced that certain things will put you in labor, I personally still believe the only thing that puts you in labor is a baby thats ready to come out but still, it was fun trying!
We "got to know each other" since everyone including the labor and delivery nurses said that it would induce labor..
then we went to pietros and got an all meat pizza.. 7 meats.. not my style but they say the meats really get things moving..
after lunch we took a nice long walk around downtown since gravity is said to move things along also..
After our relaxing date we headed over to my family's house and then his and we spent the afternoon catching up with our favorite people.
That evening I started having contractions but they weren't too painful and they were very far apart so I didn't think about it..we went home and went to bed and I was up all night with horrible contractions but for some reason didn't think about it at all.. I just kept sleeping inbetween them.
Monday Nov. 23 Kyle went to work at 4am. While he was there he was offered a job at the local radio station. good thing joey didn't come the night before!
I stayed home all day cleaning up.. My sister in law shook her head at me while I vacuumed and said to chill out since I was about to pop.. little did she know. Later that night I ended up giving Tony and Kyle haircuts and thats when the contractions really kicked in! Then it was off to the mall to get some much needed clothes for my hubby since I knew he'd have to go without for a long time if we didn't go that night.. little did I know.
Thinking back I can't believe myself for doing all that I did that day. I should have been at home relaxing not cleaning, cutting and shopping!
We got back from the mall and went for a walk which made my contractions jump from every 5 min to every 2 minutes.. I went home and took a hot bath to see if that calmed them down and sure enough it didn't.. we were on our way to the hospital and arrived there at exactly 1opm.
They hooked me up to the monitors and checked me but I was only 1 cm dilated.. they won't admit you until you're 3. Thankfully since we had come from vacaville they said we could stay in the hospital and walk for 2 hours and they'd check me again.. desperate to have our baby and not have to go home we walked. For 2 hours straight up and down the empty hospital halls.. SOOO crappy!!! I thought my back was going to snap in half! After 2 hours we went back and got hooked up and checked again.. I was still only 2 cm but my contractions were insane so the doc said he'd let me stay while he did a c section and if I could get to 3 by the time he was done in the OR he'd admit me otherwise we were on our way. In the next hour my contractions took off and I was in full on labor.. I don't know how to explain the pain but man. I still can't believe how bad it hurts.. Finally I was checked again and at 3 cm so I was admitted and thankfully given my DRUGS!!!! then it was chill.. I couldn't feel anything from my belly down and if I could get epidurals in pill form I'd go numb every weekend.. coolest feeling ever.. anyway.. I ended up getting stuck at 3 cm for 5 hours before they finally gave me pitocin to speed things up.. 5 hours later my water broke, 1 hour later I was at 8 cm and 2 1/2 hours later of pushing my son was born! oh and you can still feel the pushing part with an ep so i don't have a clue as to how ppl do it natural.. ya'll are nuts!
Tue Nov 24th Joseph Alan Wieder arrived.
He was 8lbs 10oz and was 20 inches long. He was born at 9:56 pm 4 minutes short of 24 hours from the time we got there the night before. Longest 24 hours of my life! and my poor husband had been up since 4am the day before..
Looking back I can't believe how providential everything was. We were able to have an awesome date on sunday together and catch up with our family's before parenting began. Kyle had to go to work monday and was offered a job. We should have been sent home from the hospital that night but the nurses were awesome so we got to stay long enough to go into active labor. Our dads were off of work. My brother was home from tour and Catie and Annie were chill.
I'll never forget this experience. The way Joseph looked when they held him up and placed him on my chest. Gray and wrinkled. He was calm and quiet as soon as he heard his mommy and daddy talking to him and just lay there with his big blue eyes scanning back and forth listening closely. The look on Kyles face when he saw his son and the kiss he gave me when he told me "good job, i love you." The proud look on my moms face as she took pictures and bawled her eyes out. We had become parents and I have never been happier in my entire life! One of Joeys great uncles recently came over to meet him and made the comment that he was having a spiritual moment while holding him and he couldn't be more right on. Thats exactly how it is. I just stare at him and I'm in awe that this little baby was at one point microscopic and he is now a gorgeous healthy newborn that is half me and half of my best friend. I can't believe that we wanted to wait 5 years for this..
So yeah.. my labor of love in a nutshell.. I could give the details but who likes details.. Joey came out with road rash on the back of his head and a bruise on the front.. I think you could imagine the details now? very unnecessary. besides, the most important part of the story is the fact that I have been blessed with a husband I don't deserve and a beautiful son I can't take credit for creating. Life is good!
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